Weird, Wrecked, and Wretched Weekend....

Ok, so I'm having some fun with alliteration. Anyways, it was a HORRIBLE weekend. Like I mentioned in my previous post, I was supposed to go to Arlington, TX with the Blair Band....never happened...but not for lack of trying...ughh...

Saturday Morning...I got to the airport with plenty of time, parked my car in the economy lot and hopped the shuttle to the terminal. Waited around 3 hours to find out that all flights into Dallas/Fort Worth on American Airlines were cancelled out of Nashville. That sucks. Ok, so plan B. We don't have a plan B....sucks even more, but I figured, 'Cool...free weekend!'....Soooo not to be. Around 10:45 that evening, as I was getting ready for bed...mind you, I was still trying to recover from whatever virus was kicking my butt this past week...I got a phone call informing me that we were booked on the 6:35am flight the next morning. yeah, I know..crazy huh? Well, it was true..
This leads us to:

Sunday...I manage to get up around 3 AM...yes, you read that right. 3:00-in the %*&#@-ing morning so I can get to the airport with enough time, only to park, hop yet another shuttle, go through security, to find out around 6:15am that we can't possibly leave until at least 7:55 am because the crew got in too late the night before and weren't even legal to fly until then. So the executive decision came down to cancel yet again.....at least I got to sleep...but I was pissed. Why couldn't we just have re-scheduled on Saturday? Why did they feel the need to drag me out of bed at 3:00 in the morning?

Anyways, I feel like I'm still trying to get back on my feet from Sunday...

Anyhoo....on another note, I'm helping to get ready for the String Crossings Honor Orchestra which will be going on This Saturday, March 3rd at Belmont University. It's supposed to be a great recruiting tool for the school as well as the String Crossings Music Camp which promotes "Music Without Boundaries"...a cool title, I might add. Either way...it's bound to be a good concert...I just hope I have enough energy to survive! I'm running around trying to get lots of things ready for it!

Gotta go and sleep...tomorrow's another teaching day!

~KMB

FOUND: My Optimism!...among other things....

Today was sooooo much better than yesterday!

1) I FOUND MY TRIO BOOKS!!!!!! ok...I know that it's really stupid to be so excited, but I looked for them everywhere...and I do mean everywhere! I was about 5 minutes away from ordering them again...and they were kind of expensive...enough so I maybe would have broken even by playing this wedding on Friday....so Thank God I found them!!

I guess that's really the only great thing that happened....it was still a really long day, but I feel a lot better and more optimistic about everything.

Ok...so onto a new topic...and it's not an easy one, so bear with me. I need to get more involved. With life. I work so much...and most of my time is taken up by either teaching, driving to go teach, or traveling to a gig (on weekends). I've noticed that when I do have a free weekend, which is somewhat rare, I have a tendency to spend Saturdays and Sundays in bed...or still in pajamas. I should mention too, that I usually end up spending these weekends alone as my husband leaves for Atlanta to work every Thursday and I don't see him again until Sunday evening. I sometimes have all these grand plans about things I want to do around the house, but nothing ever seems to get done. At first, I used to brush it off, by just saying "well, it's my day off"...but now I'm not so sure.

I first realized that this has been becoming a problem back in November..when friend of mine had a party on a Saturday night for her birthday. I felt a little down for not having many plans, and I didn't have a lot of money, or the energy to go out and do anything on Friday. Saturday came and I was not quite as excited about this party (even though I had rsvp'd that I'd go). I got feeling really lonely again, and as it got worse, the less I wanted to go out. So I made excuses and didn't end up going as I'd spent a lot of time already in tears...just lying there in bed. I felt pathetic...but I really didn't know how to fix it. So...I don't really want to spend another weekend like that...it was definitely a low point for me.

So I want to change. I think I make excuses because I don't want to bother people...but I really do need to get out more. I have in the past not made any plans on weekends, thinking that friends who have also just gotten married are probably busy with their own lives and already have plans. I let myself get swept up in that and it pulls me under...well NO MORE!!! When Alan is around...I never seem to feel this way...so I know that there's something not quite right. I can't just rely on him for all my company...so I'm not going to!

I'm going to join a book club. I've never been in one, but I hope it's going to be fun! I also want to learn to play tennis. I mean, really learn...as opposed to just remember what they tried to teach me in high school. Plus I figure the regular exercise will be good for me and I'll start feeling a lot better! I think I've got a solid lead on the book club thing, so I'm already starting to implement my plan--and it feels really good :) Now onto the tennis idea.....

I know this is a really long post, but I've been needing to vent this for awhile. I'm hoping that by writing it down and putting it out there I will find that a) I'm really not alone and a lot of people feel like this after they get married and b) it will push me to really get off my butt and DO something to change instead of just talking about it.

So thanks for listening/reading....I'll keep you updated!

~KMB

And a little background please......

So I'm now living in Nashville and have been since the Summer of 2002, when I moved to start my Master's...and Thank the Good Lord that's done. I'm all for a bit of academic hoop-jumping, but people please...luckily I graduated in 2005!

Anyways, while in the last year of my master's, I met my wonderful husband and we got married July 22nd, 2006. I promise to post some pics soon (my wonderful MIL just scanned out entire collection of pics onto discs so now I just have to sort them.) Here's a couple of pics from the Honeymoon though...until I can get some of the wedding ones up! We spent two weeks in Hawaii--on Oahu and Big Island in Kona...and had a wonderful time!




This is the view from our 3rd floor balcony on Oahu the first week in Hawaii. I miss that place!!

Here's one of Alan just chillin' on the balcony after a long day of playing tourist! Isn't he cute?





This one was taken at the Luau at the Polynesian Cultural Center on Oahu. We had a blast...but Alan doesn't like this picture!!




And of course, here's a pic of me trying to learn how to surf. I got really badly sunburned after that lesson and Alan had to take care of me!!









Here's a few from our Waterfall tour while on Big Island. It was lots of fun...although some days it was really windy!!!





These are of Alan and me standing behind a 500ft. waterfall in North Kohala on the Big Island...it was absolutely beautiful...and we got soaked!!







We did get to see some volcanoes, but I can't seem to get those pics loaded...I'll try to add them another time!

I'm teaching at Belmont University again this semester (where I got my master's) as an adjunct instructor of celtic fiddle. I have a few classical students too, and I've discovered that I really like teaching at the undergraduate and graduate levels! I also maintain a number of students outside of Belmont and I play with a couple of different bands--mostly celtic. (More on those in another post!) I think it's about time I sign off of here...I ended up staying up way too late last night figuring this thing out--I need to get some sleep tonight! Enjoy!!

~KMB