I thought I would try to be better about posting, but apparently I'm just not!
I've been back from buffalo for about three weeks now and sooooo many things have happened:
1) I got a job with the Art Institute of Atlanta...to start in October of THIS year (I'll mainly be teaching classes on fridays/saturdays...etc)
So starting in October, I will be in three states EVERY week....I think I'm crazy, but at least the money will be good!
2) I played at the Grandfather Mountain Highland Games a few weeks ago and will post pics soon! I had a great weekend, met some awesome new people, and overall just had a lot of fun! It rained out our last set on Sunday, but that was alright...as I had to get back to Nashville anyways!
For more info, I will be blogging on the goddess blogs about my fun time...there were lots of men in kilts!!!
3) My husband and I celebrated our one-year anniversary a few days ago (July 22nd)!!!! We had a wonderful day--very leisurely and finished it off with a yummy trip to the Melting Pot (fondue restaurant)....there were a dozen roses waiting for me on the table--it was so beautiful!! (And the food was great too!)
All in all...everything is going pretty good right now. My parents are doing ok...well, Dad is being dad and has his good days and bad...but he's hanging on.
Oh yesh, and I thought I had played my last Blair band gig at Grandfather Mountain, but apparently I'm on for at least one more! We're off to Raleigh-Durham, NC on August 4th....hopefully it'll be good times!!!
So that's about it methinks. Life has it's ups and downs, but hopefully there will be more ups than downs in the near future!!
~KMB
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Sunday, July 1, 2007
Planes, Trains, and well...just planes...
So I'm off tomorrow morning at the butt-crack of dawn to catch a plane home to Buffalo, NY to visit the parents for a week. I'm looking forward to seeing lots of people while I'm there!
And now, onwards to the good news updates!
I've just signed the contracts to play full time (well, once a week rehearsal plus the concerts) as the Principal second violinist in the Bowling Green Western Symphony Orchestra. I'll also be teaching in the pre-college department at Western Kentucky University (which the BGWSO is a part of).
I may have another possible job in the works...though I'm unsure of when I might start. I'm hoping it will happen as the extra money will be a godsend!
So keep your fingers crossed for me :)
~KMB
And now, onwards to the good news updates!
I've just signed the contracts to play full time (well, once a week rehearsal plus the concerts) as the Principal second violinist in the Bowling Green Western Symphony Orchestra. I'll also be teaching in the pre-college department at Western Kentucky University (which the BGWSO is a part of).
I may have another possible job in the works...though I'm unsure of when I might start. I'm hoping it will happen as the extra money will be a godsend!
So keep your fingers crossed for me :)
~KMB
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Update
So I know I've been a bit down as of late due to the ole' family situation and I really appreciate everyone's kind thoughts and prayers! (Twolilhahas, thanks so much for your comment!) I again, realized how bad I've been about leaving these updates...but I have to be honest--I didn't think anyone actually read my blog (silly me!).
Anyways, Dad got quite a bit better during his 15-day stay in the hospital, which we were happy about since there were a few days that, at the time, made it look like he might not come home at all. And of course, me being 750 miles away in Nashville, doesn't help my emotional state.
So he was finally able to come home last week and since that time, My mother has informed me that he seems to have slid downhill pretty fast. It seems that while in the hospital, they get him feeling really good on these powerful steriods (so he thinks he's better) and then they cut him back down once he's home. He's now huffing and puffing again and complaining (I swear my mother's a saint to even put up with it!) and he's being his usual charming self (read dripping sarcasm here.)
I'm headed home on Monday for a week and I'm really glad that I'll have a good chance to see both my parents. I'm worried a bit about my mom. I don't think she stands up to my dad enough and he tries to control everything, partly because he really doesn't have much left that he CAN control. It's sad to see really. So anyhoo...that's about it.
I've been working a lot (teaching, gigging, etc.). We finally finished up the String Crossings Camp at Belmont, which for those that don't know, it's a string camp for highschoolers who want to learn to play classical, jazz/rock, and bluegrass/country/Irish fiddle. It was a very successful week, but after staying in the dorms with those kids, I'm very tired!
I have a few more non-medical updates that I'll try to post later, but I've got to run and go teach a violin lesson!
~KMB
Anyways, Dad got quite a bit better during his 15-day stay in the hospital, which we were happy about since there were a few days that, at the time, made it look like he might not come home at all. And of course, me being 750 miles away in Nashville, doesn't help my emotional state.
So he was finally able to come home last week and since that time, My mother has informed me that he seems to have slid downhill pretty fast. It seems that while in the hospital, they get him feeling really good on these powerful steriods (so he thinks he's better) and then they cut him back down once he's home. He's now huffing and puffing again and complaining (I swear my mother's a saint to even put up with it!) and he's being his usual charming self (read dripping sarcasm here.)
I'm headed home on Monday for a week and I'm really glad that I'll have a good chance to see both my parents. I'm worried a bit about my mom. I don't think she stands up to my dad enough and he tries to control everything, partly because he really doesn't have much left that he CAN control. It's sad to see really. So anyhoo...that's about it.
I've been working a lot (teaching, gigging, etc.). We finally finished up the String Crossings Camp at Belmont, which for those that don't know, it's a string camp for highschoolers who want to learn to play classical, jazz/rock, and bluegrass/country/Irish fiddle. It was a very successful week, but after staying in the dorms with those kids, I'm very tired!
I have a few more non-medical updates that I'll try to post later, but I've got to run and go teach a violin lesson!
~KMB
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
The journey of death
So I've been really bad at blogging the past few months. I have no real excuse except for life. Life kind of got in the way, and I just never got around to sitting down to write much.
Here's an update:
I worked a lot until the end of the semester and stayed busy....money for bills is ALWAYS a good thing.
I saw my dad over Mother's day weekend...he's not doing good. He was worse then than when I saw him in April at the funeral in chicago. It seems like he's sliding downhill faster and faster these days....and there's nothing I can do to help.
The worst part of life is watching someone die a little bit at a time and knowing that there's not a damn thing you can do to stop it.
He's going into the hospital today (or should be) because he's so dehydrated that he's shutting his kidneys down. He was supposed to go yesterday (per doctors orders), but being the curmudgeon that he is, didn't want to go...as he hates the ER.
And unfortunately, my mother, who is his caregiver, can't just pick him up and take him to the hospital. He still has the right to refuse treatment...yada yada yada.
So anyways, back to reality. Dad was so sick today that he finally agreed (or so we all thought) to go to the hospital this afternoon. However, as of this afternoon, he was still being an idiot and he won't go. Anyways, I'm just hoping that he hasn't damaged his kidneys so badly that he's going to need dialysis, because that opens up a new kind of Hell that neither mom nor dad really needs.
Mom thinks he's giving up on life. At this point, I think I almost agree with her as he's really not eating much and he's losing too much weight. I wish my mom and I weren't on this emotional rollercoaster right along with him...it sucks.
And the worst part? Unless he's on his death bed...I can't really afford to go home until July. I wish I could fly home today (if I weren't sick myself--some virus that doctor thinks was helped partly by stress)...but I already bought my tickets for the first week in July. I'm just hoping he makes it that long. And if I need to go home...well, I'll cross that bridge when I have to...we'll figure something out.
Anyways....so that's life at the moment. And from my view...everything pretty much sucks.
~KMB
Here's an update:
I worked a lot until the end of the semester and stayed busy....money for bills is ALWAYS a good thing.
I saw my dad over Mother's day weekend...he's not doing good. He was worse then than when I saw him in April at the funeral in chicago. It seems like he's sliding downhill faster and faster these days....and there's nothing I can do to help.
The worst part of life is watching someone die a little bit at a time and knowing that there's not a damn thing you can do to stop it.
He's going into the hospital today (or should be) because he's so dehydrated that he's shutting his kidneys down. He was supposed to go yesterday (per doctors orders), but being the curmudgeon that he is, didn't want to go...as he hates the ER.
And unfortunately, my mother, who is his caregiver, can't just pick him up and take him to the hospital. He still has the right to refuse treatment...yada yada yada.
So anyways, back to reality. Dad was so sick today that he finally agreed (or so we all thought) to go to the hospital this afternoon. However, as of this afternoon, he was still being an idiot and he won't go. Anyways, I'm just hoping that he hasn't damaged his kidneys so badly that he's going to need dialysis, because that opens up a new kind of Hell that neither mom nor dad really needs.
Mom thinks he's giving up on life. At this point, I think I almost agree with her as he's really not eating much and he's losing too much weight. I wish my mom and I weren't on this emotional rollercoaster right along with him...it sucks.
And the worst part? Unless he's on his death bed...I can't really afford to go home until July. I wish I could fly home today (if I weren't sick myself--some virus that doctor thinks was helped partly by stress)...but I already bought my tickets for the first week in July. I'm just hoping he makes it that long. And if I need to go home...well, I'll cross that bridge when I have to...we'll figure something out.
Anyways....so that's life at the moment. And from my view...everything pretty much sucks.
~KMB
Monday, April 16, 2007
Contemplations.....
Well, Easter has come and gone and it was good...I guess. It was a little sad as I compared it to Easters past and it just didn't quite measure up. I played a gig on Easter. And spent the weekend thousands of miles away from my husband. That alone was kind of a downer.
I used to love Easter. It was a time I got to see family, catch up with the cousins (on my mom's side of the family), have Easter-egg hunts, find our Easter baskets and pretty much enjoy the holiday. As I've gotten older I realize how little there is of that. This year, the only real highlight was getting an easter box in the mail (a few days late) from my mom...who tried to cleverly say it was the "Easter Bunny" but put her return address on the box. It was definitely a welcome surprise, but it reminded me how far we've come and how life has changed so much. I miss the old times. My resolution is to make the next holidays more important...to keep them sacred. If I don't, if I treat these special days as just another ordinary working day, I've lost something. And I'm not sure I'll ever get it back if I don't consciously make the effort.
I suppose that I've been thinking about these things and family for a little while now. I got a phone call the other night from my cousin in New Jersey, who was the deliverer of some awful news. My cousin, (actually my second cousin--but family nonetheless) was murdered last Wednesday/Thursday night. And he was only 23. His life was snuffed out, taken just like that before he'd really even had a chance to live. And it made me sick inside. It made me look at life a little differently...and realize how much, we, as people take for granted every single day.
When my husband got home on Sunday, I held him for a long time. Just held him...and realized how precious life truly is. I don't want to take him for granted. I want to live in each moment and realize how valuable it is...because for some, you never know when a kiss or a hug could be the last you'll have.
R.I.P Matthew Christian Haller...you'll be greatly missed.
~KMB
I used to love Easter. It was a time I got to see family, catch up with the cousins (on my mom's side of the family), have Easter-egg hunts, find our Easter baskets and pretty much enjoy the holiday. As I've gotten older I realize how little there is of that. This year, the only real highlight was getting an easter box in the mail (a few days late) from my mom...who tried to cleverly say it was the "Easter Bunny" but put her return address on the box. It was definitely a welcome surprise, but it reminded me how far we've come and how life has changed so much. I miss the old times. My resolution is to make the next holidays more important...to keep them sacred. If I don't, if I treat these special days as just another ordinary working day, I've lost something. And I'm not sure I'll ever get it back if I don't consciously make the effort.
I suppose that I've been thinking about these things and family for a little while now. I got a phone call the other night from my cousin in New Jersey, who was the deliverer of some awful news. My cousin, (actually my second cousin--but family nonetheless) was murdered last Wednesday/Thursday night. And he was only 23. His life was snuffed out, taken just like that before he'd really even had a chance to live. And it made me sick inside. It made me look at life a little differently...and realize how much, we, as people take for granted every single day.
When my husband got home on Sunday, I held him for a long time. Just held him...and realized how precious life truly is. I don't want to take him for granted. I want to live in each moment and realize how valuable it is...because for some, you never know when a kiss or a hug could be the last you'll have.
R.I.P Matthew Christian Haller...you'll be greatly missed.
~KMB
Saturday, April 7, 2007
Happy Easter!
I'm off to Salt Lake City today...yep you read that right. Salt. Lake. City. in Utah...somehow I think I'm as surprised as everyone...I never expected to go there and celebrate Easter....one of the more important Christian Holidays (like Christmas) out in Mormon country. I know I know, there are lots of other people out there too...but it is kinda different, don't you think?? (Alan has already warned me not to get married again. I told him that I wouldn't...one of him was all I could handle anyways!!!...although now I think on it, the women don't marry more than once anyway--it's the men that take multiple wives..)
I'm kinda excited about this trip and for the first time in years, a little nervous about it. I know it's a regular Blair Band gig, but we're playing in the Salt Lake City Arena and that sounds pretty cool to me! Also, I've never been to Utah.. and I'm going to buy my obligatory shot glass (if you don't know me, I tend to buy shotglasses from airports of places I've never been to before and I have quite the collection!)
I hope that wherever y'all are celebrating Easter, you have a great weekend! Happy Easter!
Gotta run and pack now!
~KMB
I'm kinda excited about this trip and for the first time in years, a little nervous about it. I know it's a regular Blair Band gig, but we're playing in the Salt Lake City Arena and that sounds pretty cool to me! Also, I've never been to Utah.. and I'm going to buy my obligatory shot glass (if you don't know me, I tend to buy shotglasses from airports of places I've never been to before and I have quite the collection!)
I hope that wherever y'all are celebrating Easter, you have a great weekend! Happy Easter!
Gotta run and pack now!
~KMB
Monday, April 2, 2007
My Life of late....
It started out so easy to keep a blog...I'd just write stuff in the evenings about my day, or my week and hope, perhaps even wish that somebody might even be reading this. Well, my busy season (that kicks in early March and goes through Easter) hit and I've just been horrible at updating this blog.
So here are the main basic points of my life thus far...at least what's been going on lately (as if anyone's reading this!):
* I've had a bunch of gigs and barely have enough time to sleep, let alone actually blog.
* I haven't done so well on getting and staying out of my funk...while I've made some great strides in doing the creative things I want to do, a few obstacles have gotten in the way...which leads to....
* I sprained my ankle, so I can't do the Irish step-dancing for awhile...which I guess is good, as I've just been too busy lately anyways, but I'm feeling the weight that I gained over the winter..and well, I just feel all blah and fat. And I'm having trouble exercising because of the ankle thing.
* I need new clothing because my stuff is all at least 2 years old and in some cases, starting to fall apart...oh yeah, and if you didn't catch the 'fat' part from above....well, nevermind.
* I started voice lessons (yay!) although I have to honestly admit I'm not practicing enough....grrr...me.
* The imminent move to Atlanta has me bummed (even though it's a little more than a year away) as I'm not sure what I want to be when I grown up (well...does this mean I have to get a real job that's not in music?) And all those fun types of questions have come up lately....if anyone has any advice, let's hear it...cuz I really don't know what to do. My husband seems to think that I'll have a ton of job offers and I won't be able to take them all...but I'm a little more skeptical and realistic. Which leads to....
* If I don't stay in music...what should I do? I've thought about law school..although I just don't think I'm cut out for that...can't do nursing or med school--can't stand the needles. I feel like if I give up on music though, I will be wasting the two degrees that I worked so hard to get. And I love music..although I will admit, the teaching has been awful lately (at least the private, non-university students.) The more I'm teaching little kids...I'm just not sure I want to do that for the rest of my life. I also feel sometimes as if my career isn't as important in the grand scheme of our family as my husband's is....and that just makes me feel a bit worthless.
* I think that people think I've become anti-social...and it's not that I have..it's just I don't get home until 8 or 9 most nights and I'm absolutely exhausted and all I can think about it getting some sleep...and while I do have some free time...I have no money and can't really afford to go out for drinks and stuff. Though I wish I could.
And it really sucks to have to admit that life just hasn't turned out the way you had envisioned it in your mind when you were younger. I know I'm going through a rough spot..but damn...it feels like it's never going to end. I don't want to move and have to start all over in a year....I did that once when I moved to Nashville and it's taken me at least 5 years, just to really feel like I'm starting to gain some ground.
Ok...methinks I'm done venting. As I'm reading back over this, I sound pathetic ....but that's pretty much how I feel lately. And I'm having trouble snapping out of it. I wish there were easy answers in life...but there aren't. I guess it wouldn't be worth it if there were...but damn, I'd give a lot right now for a nice easy way to be happy and figure all this stuff out.
It's bedtime now methinks...I've had a really bad day and I need to just get some sleep.
~KMB
So here are the main basic points of my life thus far...at least what's been going on lately (as if anyone's reading this!):
* I've had a bunch of gigs and barely have enough time to sleep, let alone actually blog.
* I haven't done so well on getting and staying out of my funk...while I've made some great strides in doing the creative things I want to do, a few obstacles have gotten in the way...which leads to....
* I sprained my ankle, so I can't do the Irish step-dancing for awhile...which I guess is good, as I've just been too busy lately anyways, but I'm feeling the weight that I gained over the winter..and well, I just feel all blah and fat. And I'm having trouble exercising because of the ankle thing.
* I need new clothing because my stuff is all at least 2 years old and in some cases, starting to fall apart...oh yeah, and if you didn't catch the 'fat' part from above....well, nevermind.
* I started voice lessons (yay!) although I have to honestly admit I'm not practicing enough....grrr...me.
* The imminent move to Atlanta has me bummed (even though it's a little more than a year away) as I'm not sure what I want to be when I grown up (well...does this mean I have to get a real job that's not in music?) And all those fun types of questions have come up lately....if anyone has any advice, let's hear it...cuz I really don't know what to do. My husband seems to think that I'll have a ton of job offers and I won't be able to take them all...but I'm a little more skeptical and realistic. Which leads to....
* If I don't stay in music...what should I do? I've thought about law school..although I just don't think I'm cut out for that...can't do nursing or med school--can't stand the needles. I feel like if I give up on music though, I will be wasting the two degrees that I worked so hard to get. And I love music..although I will admit, the teaching has been awful lately (at least the private, non-university students.) The more I'm teaching little kids...I'm just not sure I want to do that for the rest of my life. I also feel sometimes as if my career isn't as important in the grand scheme of our family as my husband's is....and that just makes me feel a bit worthless.
* I think that people think I've become anti-social...and it's not that I have..it's just I don't get home until 8 or 9 most nights and I'm absolutely exhausted and all I can think about it getting some sleep...and while I do have some free time...I have no money and can't really afford to go out for drinks and stuff. Though I wish I could.
And it really sucks to have to admit that life just hasn't turned out the way you had envisioned it in your mind when you were younger. I know I'm going through a rough spot..but damn...it feels like it's never going to end. I don't want to move and have to start all over in a year....I did that once when I moved to Nashville and it's taken me at least 5 years, just to really feel like I'm starting to gain some ground.
Ok...methinks I'm done venting. As I'm reading back over this, I sound pathetic ....but that's pretty much how I feel lately. And I'm having trouble snapping out of it. I wish there were easy answers in life...but there aren't. I guess it wouldn't be worth it if there were...but damn, I'd give a lot right now for a nice easy way to be happy and figure all this stuff out.
It's bedtime now methinks...I've had a really bad day and I need to just get some sleep.
~KMB
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